I WANT To SMOKE!!

Greetings!! It is my utmost heart-felt wish that all of you are having a wonderful week!!
Today is NOT going well for me!
I confess only to you... I smoke.
Do NOT tell my family!! They would be horribly disappointed in my lack of concern for my lungs.
I am over 18 well actually I am over 21 and smoking is LEGAL but it is becoming so taboo in the USA!!
"If" you smoke in public its is as if you are snorting coke off of a porn star!! No wait... it is now more socially acceptable to snort coke than to light up a Marlboro in some public venues!

What does any of this have to do with RabiesLove????
Everything.
I am an adult... I realize that smoking is bad for my health... I also LOVE every cig I smoke! Especially with a glass of wine or after a great meal or my ultimate is after a mind blowing orgasm!!!

Now the same can be said of my toxic relationship!
The relationship is BAD for me and my health!! This relationship causes me to feel anxiety, anger, depression ... even isolation!
BUT... there are those drug induced feelings of euphria when things are manic between us... it is US against the WORLD!

Like I said I WANT to smoke...
I have now gone 19 hours without a smoke!!!
I can think of nothing else!!
The same is true about RabieLove when infected you can think of nothing else!!
So maybe I'll last or maybe I will fail and go buy a pack!
Wish me Luck.... I am going to need it!